roast chesnuts and very naughty children

The children of France have clearly not heard about Christmas being a time of good will and love. As it gets closer and closer to Christmas their previously angelic interest in how to recite colours, numbers and shapes in English is transforming in an obvious hate for school and general disdain for their teachers, including me. Getting a child to actually sit in their chair for an entire class is now as likely as me swimming back to England in 9 days time. My anger now seems to trigger fits of giggles whereas before it would leave them dumfounded and in complete blissful silence. But don’t worry Santa, I’m making my list, I’m checking it twice and most of my kids are naughty, and no longer nice!

However, some of my less obnoxious students have still managed to supply me with some classroom entertainment. In class last week I had to, ever adoring, girls ask me excitedly if I like ‘twoilet?’ Sorry? ‘ toilette’? (do I like toilets? What?) ‘TWIIILITT!!’...oh Twilight! Ah I see the sultry blood sucking chalk board that is Edward Cullen has even managed to melt the hearts of France’s six year olds. How delightful. Elsewhere, as I was trying to introduce a group to word order using shapes colours and sizes one boy managed to point at a chosen object and announce with a furious enthusiasm that is was in fact not a big blue circle as I was lead to believe but a ‘pig circle blue’.

And for the record, the lyrics to one of my favourite Christmas songs are now in fact ‘jungle bells jungle bells, he is in the way!’ Hilarious.

I once again spent my Thursday night in the company of the lovely Swiss-German family. This resulted once more in me and my housemate being gently forced into trying some of France/Switzerland’s less delicate fusions of fruit and what I can only believe to be petrol.

And that brings me to the weekend. Strasbourg was quite simply amazing. The lights, the smells, the cathedral! We arrived on Saturday at midday and went on to explore the contents of a million little wooden stalls. With the frost biting at our ears and noses we were often obliged to charge towards vin chaud (mulled wine) stalls where we would guzzle down beakers of Christmassy delight followed by warm chocolately gaufres (waffles). 

vin chaud

beautiful cathedral

le grand sapin

As the night descended the crowds multiplied but so did the atmosphere. Every street lined with vibrant fairy lights, filled with the smell of roast chestnuts and general festive cheer. Before heading back to the hostel (which in itself was quite the adventure as the tram decided to go on strike, shock) we went found ourselves a warm little restaurant where we watched people eat, but did not quite dare try choucroute (not sure thats how you spell it). Instead I chose a steak in mustard sauce and Caitlin daringly tried the local vegetarian speciality, roast potatoes with white cheese (which tastes a lot like nature yoghurt). Back at the hostel we met our roomie for the night, a young German who was training to be a gardener who works with disabled people, in a village where they all live, interesting. Personally, I found it hard to get over the fact that she was a spitting image of Moaning Myrtle.

The next day we explored the cobbled streets of petite france where I got attacked by a large rodent, whose name I cannot remember – see pictures. Terrifying. Before heading home we dipped into a small literary café called ‘La Tinta’ – which I highly recommend. The interior was charming and quirky and the food was delicious, a chose ‘Le Tartine au Chevre’ which consisted of good french bread topped with honey, almonds, a slice of pear and lots and lots of goats cheese. NOM. 

It was a perfect Christmas weekend, until our train decided to collide with ‘une personne’ on the track at Montbeillard leaving us sitting in cold darkness for three hours whilst the body was ‘désengagé ’, delightful. This meant that our poor housemate had to come and fetch us from Besancon on a very cold wet Sunday night, sorry Ben!!

And I think that is all I have to share. Italian is going well, got three dinner invitations and one dinner party to throw over the next nine days, and then I am very much homeward bound.

Times are a changing...

In the space of two months...

la neige et l'abus !

Since my last post I have suffered both extreme weather condition and a intolerable amount of abuse from my students!!

On Monday as I was working away on the le monde anglophone with my CM2s, in, what I thought to be a rather and engaging way considering the topic, I was struck on the back of the head with a sponge! Yes. One of my petits-eleves had taken it upon themselves to simply launch something at me. Surely this isn't allowed? I was actually dumbfounded. I briefly interrogated the class until I realised it was doomed to be a futile exercise due to some form of class solidarity. When the teacher returned she was furious and insisted on a confession or a class detention, a sudden lack of class solidarity followed, but an apology did not. The accused did however get a face full of snow at break time and enjoyed the rest of his day with a red swollen eye.


Comment-on-dit 'karma'?


The pick-on-Kayleigh trend has continued throughout the week leaving me certain that both I and the children are very much ready for Christmas!!

And it is most certainly on its way! The Jura is smothered in a thick blanket of white powder leaving our fingers cold and our cars in the garage.

At the end of last week my housemates braved the artic conditions to head down to the river to enjoy un promenade dans la neige! It was quite simply, stunning...

Champagnole et la neige

Damn it, really fancied a swim

Snowy Wandering

Lac du Chalin

Last time we visited here it was boiling hot, we ate  a picnic, paddled in the water AND got sunburnt!

my five minute bonhomme de la neige

Routes

Before I wrap up I want to quickly share some fantastic translation blunders with you...

' five siz seven hate' - my kids simply cannot get to grips with the difference between 'hate' and 'eight'

'So, do your children get on well together?
Yes, but they tend to team up, be in pairs, and then they bugger a lot.
Bicker?
A yes. Bicker' 


'And then, one makes a little master, and the little master does his study and then he grows up and gets a job'  - a lovely friend of ours trying to discuss why its important to do a MA after your degree in France.

and finally...

'Yes, as you can see, my roof is very special' - a perfect example of the ever evasive difference between 'special' and 'interesting' siiigh.

Right, I must go and brave the weather, we are expecting up to 30cm in parts of the Jura today, should probably go and buy some form of nourishment.
Keeping my fingers crossed that my trains to Strasbourg won't be effected this weekend!!

A bientôt

x

first snow and french cows

First I would just like to note that I’m sitting writing this update wrapped up in my winter warmers next to the radiator and looking out over a SNOW COVERED Champagnole...I almost squealed like a child when I saw the first white scattering this morning!

So, not a lot to report but here goes... At the end of last week’s Italian class my housemate and I were ambushed by a very friendly Swiss couple who almost awkwardly asked us how we would feel about teaching four young boys English...?? This resulted in a dinner invitation and a very lovely Thursday evening. Despite gorgeous Italian food, interesting multi-lingual conversation the highlight was in fact the house itself! They live in a huge converted farmhouse, complete with what I can only describe as being a Wacky Warehouse in the loft! The house really was like something you would see on Grand Designs! At the end of the night we came to an agreement that we would dine with the family every Thursday after an hour of tutoring with the four boys, I think linguistically this could prove a very enriching experience!

We spent the weekend visiting another assistant in Dole, a small picturesque town about an hour’s drive away from Champagnole. We explored the town a little and ate a gorgeous dinner at La Bucherie, including the FIRST chips I have eaten since arriving in France, yes yes thats almost two months! Ha. I ordered a ‘franc-comtoise’ steak which was simply delicious! Afterwards we made our way to, simply ‘le pub’ for drinks, where we successfully introduced one of my flatmates to Long Island Iced Tea’s for the first time! (she will hate me for writing this, ha)!

Back in the classroom I feel certain classes are really starting to progress, whereas others I just want to slash have to scream at for the entire lesson. Earlier this week I had to suppress puerile laughter when an eight year old boy exercised his abdominal thrusts behind the teacher who was busying herself with the cd player. Elsewhere during a conversational class I asked a boy if he was a cow (in hope that we would say ‘no, I am a boy’ but in fact he confused the question with ‘what is your nationality?’ and responded quite eloquently ‘No, I am French.’

In other news I am eagerly awaiting next weekend when my housemate and I will explore the Christmas market in Alsace!! Incredible amounts of excitement!

pictures from La Foire

'i'll throw one at you'

I've really been neglecting my blog.

So to recap, last weekend I spent a lovely weekend in Dijon with my housemate. We explored the Musee des beaux arts...where I found myself having a very long difficult conversation about one of the newest exhibitions, later to find out the man to whom I had been speaking was in fact english. win.
We explored the local indoor market, which I have been told is the largest in Europe!! Later we went to La Foire Gastronomique, which I can only really describe as being the most delicious place in the world. We ate in a stall owned by a local Fromagerie, we ate a buffet of salad, raclette, chacuterie and potatoes. As shown by the picture (see above) the cheese was actually bigger than my head and was slowly melted on a very interesting lamp as you ate it. Delicieux.

We also gorged on organic homemade macaroons and biere bretonne! I was fascinated by all the artisinale creations, chocolate crafted into slices of cheese, bread carved into delicate flowers, faces smiling from fruit shaped marzipan! As I was photographing a sea of sausages the man glared at me angrily and threatened to throw one at me...time to leave perhaps?


This week I once again returned to Dijon to meet up with an old friend, we shopped, ate beautiful food in a very nice restaurant and consumed quite a lot of wine! Meeting up with her really helped, having a nice catch up definitely eased the homesickness.

We spent the next day in Besancon, exploring La Citadelle, its zoo and its museum. Again, I will post photos soon.

On the teaching front, some classes never fail to amaze me, constantly craving cultural knowledge and asking for translations of sayings etc, whereas others seem to think the best thing about having a language assistant is that they can swear in class without me noticing.

And a little something for the boys back home...I was introducing colours to a beginners class earlier this week, they had never learnt any before and were struggling tirelessly to pronounce even the simplest words, until I held up the BLACK card, at which one little boy almost fell off his chair as he yelled 'ALL BLACKS!! I KNOW I KNOW ALL BLACKS!!! Like in Rugby!!!' Hilarious, and cute.

Thats about it for now folks

a bientot

greve off and STOP eating porc brains (late)

Unfortunately what should have been a very exciting week has in fact been quite limited by the wonderful people in France who have decided they would rather wreck their country rather than work an extra two years in order to support an ageing population and an ever increasing life expectancy...My suggestion, maybe you should all just take ONE hour for lunch break instead? Au mon dieu non!!

Rant over. The greves did not however stop us from moving into our lovely new home! We have carpet, sofas AND a cooker!! I am also very pleased with my new little room! See pictures below ( aka. look Mum I'm no longer living in a cave) We made use of the new kitchen on my birthday by cooking a jurassian dinner complete with beaucoup de vin et sticky toffee pudding. If I don’t stem the flow of fromage liquide and charcuterie soon I fear I will soon be waving goodbye to my size ten skinnies and donning the biggest jumper I can find for the rest of my time here!!

Mont D'Or et Morteau!

As for work, this week I was, without any prior warning, given a small group of ‘advanced’ students for a literacy class! *runawayhideunderatable* - How am I supposed to TEACH a language I’m still learning??? However, it turned out the kids were really sweet, we went through the work together and at the end one little girl came up to me and told me it had been a pleasure being taught by me! How sweet ha. So I will have that group on a weekly basis now, which whilst being quite daunting is actually quite comforting that the teachers are trusting me, and my French, to teach their gifted and talented!! I’m also now taking an older class on Thursdays for a purely conversational class which I’m to organise and teach alone, which again is both scary and exciting! Not to mention the adult ateliers de conversations which start after the holidays.


One hilarious, if worrying, observation I made in school this week was that French school teachers seem to be somewhat blind to any form of violence. At break I watched one kid throw a marble into his classmates forehead, another kids took a bloody punch to the nose, one girl took hold of her friends doll and dangled it tauntingly over a bin...and my favourite moment, as I was trying to get one group of boys to count to 100 one headbutted another in the back of the head making him fall of the chair whilst another kicked his friend firmly in the place one does not kick a friend!! Quelle violence!

Outside the classroom, I fully enjoyed my second Italian class! It is so encouraging when you realise that it doesn’t actually matter that the course is being taught in French!!

My housemate and I were also invited to a local book reading in an independant book store (could have spent my years salary there and then). We learnt a lot about Italian immigration in the surrounding area and were welcomed by everyone there. I even have a signed book as a momento!

I start les vacances with the prospect of a day in Lons-le-Saunier tomorrow, dinner at a friends on Tuesday and a long awaited trip to Besancon on Wednesday!!

p.s. I really don’t see why selling porc brains, horse or rabbits (with heads) in Casino is necessary, merci very much.